It’s been a while since I’ve been on grace. Chile, the last time I wrote, I had 1 child, and now me and Beyonce are tied . Many things have happened, but I’m grateful for everything that has conspired that has allowed me to return to grace. This poem is for those who mutha, on today, and everyday.
*Trigger warning-Mention of pregnancy loss and grief. I have placed an asterisk next to the stanzas that contain these topics.
I won’t pretend to know what all those that mutha want on this day, but I can imagine…
I can imagine that they want some rest on today, uninterrupted
Shades drawn, knocked out, ear plugs and eye mask , weighted blanket cocoon kinda rest
Hotel kinda rest, if they really feeling it, complete with room serviced breakfast in a robe
I can imagine that they want some money on today
Crisp bills , cash app, zelle, venmo, or bitcoin if they feeling futuristic
Money exclusively for them to spend on frivolous things like candles, and skincare ,and the upteenth tube of red lipstick just cause they feel like it
I can imagine that they want some food on today
Food that makes them hum or dance while consuming it because it’s just that good
Food that is free from the gaze and judgement of others and makes its way from the mouth straight to the soul
I can imagine that they want some love on today
Love in its many forms via kind words and affirmations, a cleaned house and washed car , gentle hugs and nose kisses, a created craft project
or time just being present in the moment.
*I can imagine that they want to mourn on today
Mourn the sobering truth that those that muthered them are no longer able to mutha them in the earthly realm
Mourn the loss of their touch and their smell while listening to the last captured sound of their voice or reading saved written words
*I can imagine that they want to grieve on today
Grieve the single faint line that no matter what will not edge over to form two
Grieve the loss of a heartbeat that once was , but is no more
I can imagine that they want hope on today
Hope for new possibilities that it can and will happen for them
Hope with an unwavering faith that miracles still are possible
I can imagine that they want to laugh on today
Laugh with a joy that can’t be contained
with the wonder of what being muthered well and good muthering has produced
I can imagine that they want to celebrate on today
Celebrate the beings that they have nourished with their hands, their bodies,
and their souls
Celebrate the choices and sacrifices they made that allowed another creature to soar in freedom
I can imagine that they want to breathe on today
Exhaling real big, breathing out the burdens of life
and inhaling the blessings of abundance
I won’t pretend to know what all those that mutha want on this day, but my prayer is that your greatest wants leave your imagination and translate into the reality of your choosing.
2 thoughts on “For Those That Mutha On Today”
So grateful that you’re LEAVING ROOM FOR GRACE AGAIN. There are so many things on here that’s on my check off list. Whether it’s wanting a day of uninterrupted rest or just bask in the glory of nothingness. However, I’ve been bombarded with the thoughts of never being able to have children and also experience bitterness behind it. Can’t fully explain all the REAL emotion over it all but it has definitely been a struggle. I’ve felt the pressure, be it the constant statement “You’re so good with children when will you have your own” or this day that reminds me that there’s some important components missing. I’m literally trying to suppress the thoughts meanwhile feeling inadequate as a woman; Simply not leaving any room for grace. Pray for me as I pray for you. Love you girly!!!!
Kiesha, these are all valid thoughts and bitterness is a very real feeling, especially when it seems like others are experiencing the very thing your heart yearns for. My prayer is that you find a way to heal from the thoughts that seek to reduce you. You are an amazing woman PERIOD. . May you find rest on this side of heaven. Even if you don’t do another thing for another person, you are worth that rest. May grace envelop you and hold you in her hand tightly!